Through this exploration, I’ve been reminded of just how lucky the people are who encounter even a fraction of what we can give. I still may not trust other people, but at least I have the tools to learn and improve. Like the rest of the world, those with BPD are not perfect.
When they are in an emotionally intense situation or in a relationship, they can become overwhelmed and may hurt the ones they love. They may lash out in anger, blame others for their own behaviors, make empty promises, create chaos and instability in the relationship, or push their loved ones away. Nevertheless, the person with BPD can receive the necessary help and the cycle of emotional instability can be broken.
Once, a young girl was leaving the institution. My ex cared about her so much, and bought her gifts to take home. Her “good points” were clear, and I brought light to them by telling her how highly I thought of her for caring about these kids this way. She would immediately belittle her own actions by replying, “oh well, it’s just my job”.
Misconceptions About People With Bipolar Disorder
She is living a nomadic existence, loss of her true self, loss of innocence and truth… so sad and tragic. I actually don’t know if she has this disorder but i know she’s got something. She display many of these signs but not as extreme as what has been portrayed. Anyways, i’m a strong person but i let shit slide for a long time thinking she would realize she’s being unreasonable.
#12. Learn More About BPD
” I started to realize that it was about Control & Manipulation . My RESPECT for my self was not 100%, and so was hers for me. I still got a few “shots” in here and there, showing that I was alive.
They truly do not see their part in contributing to or primarily causing their own problems in life. This is an unconscious barrier, so you shouldn’t try to “make them see” their part in the problem. That just increases their defensiveness and makes things worse. It’s possible to have a functioning relationship with people with BPD if both parties work through it.
Borderline personality disorder is a misunderstood condition. We’re here to bust seven common myths and reveal the truth. Navigating a relationship when one of you has BPD, and the other does not, can be challenging at times. Also, if you feel like you’re competing with your partner’s phone, ask for what you need. For example, request to eat dinner just the two of you, sans screens. The same study found that some people may abruptly cut off others, like unfriending or blocking them.
It’s really easy to just label your partner as BPD and then blame them for everything. I truly believe that it’s possible for everyone to have control over their emotions, some more than others, but still… Either way, admitting there’s a problem is half the battle. Both men and women in relationships need to talk to each other about issues and not ignore them and hope they go away like most people do.
In addition, people with BPD often rely on their significant other to provide emotional stability and validation, creating an unhealthy dependency. This reliance hinders the breakup process, as the person struggling with BPD is often unaware of how to live without their partner and deeply fears abandonment. People with BPD often have difficulty controlling their emotions, as well as forming and maintaining relationships.
Treatments And Diagnosis of Patients with Borderline Personality Disorder
I now realise that for my own well-being I can’t allow her to manipulate me and hurt my feelings. My attitude is that I can’t change the way she is and so I have to protect myself from the worst aspects of her behaviour. But it’s difficult because she isn’t always horrible and I want her in my life and I still feel sad, hurt, frustrated and hopeless when I’m dealing with her. The worst thing is knowing that it’s only likely to get worse as she gets older. I know I have to put my own sanity first and I’m making changes in that regard but at times all I feel is futility and sadness and a feeling that I’m losing a friend. I know you know when i say this but i feel a very strong attraction towards her.
These seem to be the only relationships that ‘work’ these days for BPD’s. However, I don’t recommend long-term relationships for normal people because they suck! That’s why my BPD course is focused on not labeling and actually approaching the issues in your own unique point of view.
Finally after the breakup i’m not holding back. I let her know exactly what I’m not tolerating or subjecting myself to with her or anyone. She started calling/text again recently but that shortly ended after i discovered she had cheated. Surprisingly she came out with it all & how “messed up she is”, how much she regrets it, what can she do to fix things, how she’s going to change, etc. I simply told her maybe one day in the future she will have changed & things will be different but things wont be different any time soon.
My girl asked me why nothing happened with her and I told her that I was married at the time and I wasn’t going to let anything happen. My girl asked me if I had shut the other girl down every time she tried to https://hookupgenius.com/ make a move, and I told her that I did. My girl then commented that it was no wonder the other girl pursued me all weekend, because shutting a girl down like that makes them want you and come after you more.
People with BPD tend to have short, intense relationships. If you are struggling to manage your romantic relationship with someone with BPD, consider professional counseling. Taylor Counseling Group can provide you and your partner with the couples counseling you need to grow together and cope with relationship complications safely and productively. It’s easy for people with BPD to feel insecure about themselves and their relationships.
